JOBS I HAVE DONE #8: Attorney

The hardest I ever studied in my life was for the bar exam, which I passed on the first try. However, my interest in the law was always about research and writing, and I didn't do a good job of making connections with hiring firms while still in school. Instead, I got a job in the Commissioner's Office at the Food and Drug Administration. I had drug companies call me every day asking whether a certain patent would be extended, thinking perhaps that the rookie lawyer would let it slip. Nope, they had to wait for my Federal Register article like everyone else. We were also involved in a peculiar pseudo-trial situation. The FDA includes many doctors in the human efficacy testing phase of various drugs. Some of those doctors, instead of recruiting volunteers for experiments, just sell the medicine to their patients as if it’s already approved. When the FDA finds out, those guys get disqualified from future tests, among other punishments. So we had an MD panel of judges, piles of evidence to process, and a kind of courtroom hearing. Odd. I got to do a lot of project management and work with some highly-placed executives. Also, at one point, I had a breast implant for a paperweight. 

Skills Acquired:

• Handling confidential information.
• Supporting the organization during conflict and controversy.
• Preferring the human body in its natural form.